Wingdings

Why does this font even exist? I mean really? Sometimes I feel the need to express myself and I think words are good, but not just words alone... Body language won't help. Italics? Shouting?

No... Fonts. That's what I need. And then goes the search. Lucida Grande? Verdana? Hmm... nice, but not quite. That slight squiggle on the lower case "f" just doesn't quite capture the pathos in my soul right now.

Trebuchet? Courier? Argh! Why isnt' there a font that can look into my soul and match the passion of my thoughts to pixelized letters, bent just right? Well, eventually I get to Wingdings, and sometimes I forget what it is. Two seconds later I think, "Um... no. Unless I'm emailing one of those little robots that vacuums the carpet to tell him that he missed a spot near the door, this has to be the dumbest way to express myself."

But in the interest of fontal equality, I'm going to tell a joke in Wingdings. Bonus points (absolutely no value anywhere) for anyone who spends the time trying to translate.

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh

I'll leave this post with some modern day philosophy. (In Arial).
1) I think we should replace "If a tree crashed in the woods, and no one was there to hear it, would it make a sound?" with "If you misspelled a word in Wingdings, and no one could possibly read it, would spellcheck let you know?"

2) The Wingdings equivalent for a lower case letter S is: "s" The Wingings equivalent to a Question Mark is: "?".

WHY??????